In a world

I am lost in a world full of people. Each person has their own expectations and desires for me. Each person feels something different about me. Some feel disappointment, some excitement, some pride, some love, some hate, and some simply don't know that I exist.
I am trying to figure out how to live for me. To do what I feel is best for me. To live by the desires of my heart, and to figure out exactly what it is that I want in this life. I need to quit living certain ways, and doing certain things to please other people. Or to not do things simply because someone else wouldn't like it.
I need to live righteously, but also the way that I feel is best for me. Just because someone else feels something is right for me, doesn't mean that it is. They may think they know all the circumstances, but they don't. They may think they know how I feel, but once again, they don't.
I'm not a perfect person. I have my flaws. But, no one is perfect, everyone has their flaws. They may be different, but they are always present. We are all trying to get along in this life, and make something of ourselves. And overtime, become perfect and more like Christ. My way of becoming more like Christ, may be different than your way of getting there. There is no right or wrong way. As long as I am striving my best to be all that I can be. And to always be my best self. That is what counts.

True Love

Someday, I want a love like this.

Awful

This is apparently my favorite word lately. Just ask my friends. Although, there isn't really a single thing in life right now that is awful. Besides the finals that loom ahead, and the end of the semester that is right around the corner. This semester has been so much fun, that I just don't want it to come to an end. Full of hardships, and full of the most incredible fun. The hardest times bring the best times.

My Poky MG girls.

These two are awesome friends. Nicasio and Tys are some of the best guys ever.

Disney dance. These three girls are my best friends.

This year would have been completely awful without my Lynsie girl. I love her.

Random fact

I was sitting here reading blogs, when a stupid little bug kept flying by my face. I tried to squish him between my hands every time he flew by, not thinking I'd actually get him. But. He must've been a slow bug. I squished him. Between my hands. Gross. And yet AWESOME!! I can now say that I've done it. I've always tried and never accomplished it before. Yip. Yip.

And now, since I've already started a post, I might as well continue with my thoughts lately.
College is hard. Ha. Understatement of the century. But less than three weeks until my first year is complete. I didn't do nearly as well as I wanted to, but I didn't give up. I'm retaking a class next fall, but other than that, I can live with the rest of my grades.

I am continually amazed at the incredible people that have been put into my life. There is no way I would've made it through this past year without my incredible family and friends. I always have so much support from all of them in everything that I do. There have been so many instances, especially the past couple weeks, that I felt like giving up and didn't feel like I could go on. But, my family and friends were always there to help me keep going. Also, my Heavenly Father. He has done more for me than I could've ever thought possible. I am one blessed girl.

I have met so many incredible people here at ISU, and I am so grateful for my decision to come here. I wouldn't have it any other way.

I have a quote hanging on my wall that is by far one of my favorites,

Not me

Everyone and their dog is getting married or having a baby. Not me folks! Not me. Why not? Because I am 19 years young and enjoying this single life I am living.
Also, it isn't official yet, but pretty darn close. (one month) To all of those who were convinced I'd be married/engaged by the summer after freshman year of college, I JUST PROVED YOU WRONG. Yeah, I said it.

Fix you

Sometimes love sucks. The only person I want is off limits for another nine months. Not to mention far away, what seems like a bajillion miles away. What makes matters yet worse is that I haven't gotten a letter in two and a half months. And before that, it was two and a half months.
Every time I am upset or have just had a rough day, the only thing I want at all is for him to hold me and tell me that everything is going to be okay. But. I can't have that. Not yet.

I wouldn't really do this :) but, it speaks truth.

This is probably the hardest thing I've ever had to do. Among everything else that isn't going right. Having the perfect relationship, and then having to wait two years to get it back, is the hardest thing. But. The best things in life are worth the wait. And, Elder Isaac DeMar Wood is the best thing. I miss him more than words can ever explain. The countless times I would go to him bawling, and he would just hold me and let me cry. Every time after I was done crying, he would give me the biggest hug and tell me that everything would be okay. He believed in me. Then, he would give me a reason to smile. That boy makes me smile bigger than the sun. Nobody else has that power. I miss him.
9 more months. I've got this. three eighths to go. thirty-five percent left.

Favorite tunes

I am loving these tunes lately:

"I have died everyday waiting for you. Darling, don't be afraid. I have loved you for a thousand years. I'll love you for a thousand more."